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So funny, it hurts.

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1 So funny, it hurts. on Wed Nov 24, 2010 4:01 am

Christo


Racist Bastard
A shark, a dolphin, and an eel swim into an undersea bar. The bartender asks what they'll be having. The dolphin orders a bourbon. The eel, who is underage, orders a Roy Rogers. The shark eats the bartender. The shark is then ostracized for his social faux pas and leaves the bar, his head bowed down in shame.

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2 Re: So funny, it hurts. on Wed Nov 24, 2010 4:02 am

Christo


Racist Bastard
For five years, two sharks and an dolphin have worked side by side every day as window washers, and every night after work they stopped for a drink. One day, disaster struck, and the dolphin fell to his death. The police came to the site and began asking questions.

"Where does he live?" The sharks shrugged their shoulders. "Is he married?" The sharks didn't know. "What is his name?" The sharks shrugged again. "You worked with this guy for five years and you don't know anything about him?" the cop asked. "I know something about him," one shark volunteered. "He has two assholes." "What are you talking about?" said the cop. "Well," said the shark, "Whenever we go for a drink after work the bartended says, 'Here comes the dolphin with the two assholes.'"

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3 Re: So funny, it hurts. on Wed Nov 24, 2010 4:03 am

Christo


Racist Bastard
Why are Shark populations declining?


The populations of many species of shark are suffering a documented decline. Overfishing and excessive bycatch, Shark finning and habitat destruction are all seriously impacting on global shark populations.

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4 Re: So funny, it hurts. on Wed Nov 24, 2010 4:04 am

Christo


Racist Bastard
Why do sharks sometimes attack people?

There are many theories about why sharks sometimes attack people. Some attacking species, such as the Great white shark, may be confusing a human for a seal or other prey animal; this would be typical in the case of an attack against a surfer. The shape of a surfer lying on a board closely resembles a seal from beneath the surface. Also, sharks have sensory organs on their nose to pick up electrical signals, such as those generated by muscles when moving. Often the shark that attacks a human will make only one bite and then go away. This behaviour has many possible explanations, one being that humans don't taste good (or at least, as good), or are lacking the necessary fat, and another being that sharks normally make one swift attack, and then retreat and wait for the victim to die, or exhaust itself, before it comes back to feed. This protects the shark from injury, especially tooth loss, from a wounded and aggressive target; however, it also allows humans time to get out of the water and survive. Another theory is that the electrical receptors, which pick up movement, do not pick up the same signals from a wounded human as they would a wounded seal, and so they are more cautious. In fact, it has recently been shown that surfers do not give off the same electrical signals as seals, or it is thought there would be far more attacks.

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5 Re: So funny, it hurts. on Wed Nov 24, 2010 4:04 am

penguinsgoboom


Batman's Lover
what?

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6 Re: So funny, it hurts. on Wed Nov 24, 2010 4:05 am

Lunar


No.1 Racist Tank
No.1 Racist Tank
I don't understand Sad

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7 Re: So funny, it hurts. on Wed Nov 24, 2010 4:10 am

Cydonia


Racist Bastard
so i herd u liek sharks

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8 Re: So funny, it hurts. on Wed Nov 24, 2010 4:11 am

Bacon


Greedy Cocky Racist Bastard
What am I reading?

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9 Re: So funny, it hurts. on Wed Nov 24, 2010 4:12 am

Cydonia


Racist Bastard
Bacon wrote:What am I reading?
discovery channel

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10 Re: So funny, it hurts. on Wed Nov 24, 2010 4:14 am

Theosis


King of Racists
King of Racists
who are you people?


_________________
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11 Re: So funny, it hurts. on Wed Nov 24, 2010 4:24 am

Christo


Racist Bastard
Time for the Alligator ;D

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wzCaowoZg_A

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12 Re: So funny, it hurts. on Wed Nov 24, 2010 4:30 am

Qiao


Greedy Cocky Racist Bastard
too long to read

but this is better

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aQxcugbmg9M

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13 Re: So funny, it hurts. on Sun Dec 05, 2010 10:02 am

What do you call a man with no arms no legs who sits on your door step =] ??
MATT

What do you call a man with no arms no legs who's in your swimming pool =] ??
BOB

What do you call a man with no arms no legs buried six feet under the earth =]??
DOUG

What do you call a person with no arms n legs on a tennis court =]??
ANNETTE

What do you call a man with no arms n legs on your wall =D ??
ART

What do you call him if he has no tongue to ?
Tasteless ART XD BWAHAHHAHA...



goodbye.

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14 Re: So funny, it hurts. on Mon Dec 06, 2010 12:49 pm

DeliciouslyGood


Racist Bastard
I'm lost x.x

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15 Re: So funny, it hurts. on Mon Dec 06, 2010 2:54 pm

Star


Racist Bastard
shark is gey dolphin?

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